All About Tahoe (and you) (Krissie)

26 Sep

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That’s me, Jenny and Tim at the Airbnb we’re renting. Things are going about as well as they could be – we found a better place for him to live, he’s been a little squirrelly but not angry (which for me is one of the hardest things to deal with). We had a good meeting with the mental health place, we’ve dealt with various stuff and we’ve got a lot more to go. I’ll give you a full report when I get back next week.

I think I won’t have to worry as much when I get back. I’m working hard on not worrying anyway but he’s my son – hard not to.

Richie and Tim went for a hike along the rim trail near where Tim lived the last time he was out here, near the trails he worked on for the Nevada Conservation Corps. It’s where he’s happiest.

So what’s happening with you guys as fall starts? When I get home I’ll start nesting with a vengeance, for now, bird by bird.

So what’s on your agenda?

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Life’s Short, Be Happy

25 Sep

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I’m not actually sure how I feel about that quote. It’s kind of a “you’re gonna die, so whoop it up” approach to life that I don’t think is particularly helpful. Still, it’s a quote about happiness. THESE AREN’T EASY TO FIND, YOU KNOW.

How were you happy this week, my little fruitflies?

All About You (Krissie)

19 Sep

Photo on 9-19-16 at 10.04 AM First off, you guys in the New York/NJ area – be safe.

2: You go, Rami Malek!

3. Did I mention I lost more weight? I’m at 227.2 which makes it a little more than 22.5 pounds. It’ll be 25 eventually – wahoo! I am losing weight slowly, but then, I’m not really trying. I’m just avoiding unhealthy stuff, pushing fiber and fruit, avoiding fats. I’ve lost my taste for a whole lot of stuff (sugar, crispy fried stuff) and when we get back from Tahoe I’ll start swimming again.

4. Sigh. Okay, we’re leaving for Tahoe tomorrow. My stomach is in a knot and I’m feeling worried and upset. I did go to an Al-Anon meeting Saturday, which was great. It’s tricky, because the issue is now more mental illness than substance abuse, but hey, I qualify at Al-Anon with my father and brother and sister. And Tim’s years as a druggy teen. I have to figure out balance. Good thoughts and prayers gratefully accepted.  And while I’m weepy, edgy and distressed I’m not depressed (gotta keep celebrating that fact).

We’re meeting with lots of people.  I’m feeling really pulled in a lot of directions, and I have to perform triage.  I think first I have to take care of me because, like the example of people on a plane needing oxygen, if I don’t get mine first I’ll pass out before I can help anyone else.  Second, I deal with the sickest.  Third, I deal with the troubled.

I didn’t cause it, I can’t change it, and I can’t cure it. Not for anyone.

I’m try to embed a video because it’s gorgeous, but I’m a Massive Fail, but here’s the link.  I’ve always had a weakness for scantily clad leaping male ballet dancers, so I leave you on a cheery note. Oooh, hey it looked like it worked after all.  Enjoy!

 

After that delicious treat, tell me what’s on your agenda?

Happiness is Defining Yourself

18 Sep

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Everybody wants to tell you who you are.
Screw that.
Be yourself.
Everybody else is already taken and kinda boring.

So how were you ecstatically yourself this week?

New Glasses (Krissie)

13 Sep

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New glasses. Whaddya think? I was talking with my granddaughter on FaceTime and she said “crazy hair.” Which I like. But my niece put a picture of me up on Facebook and it seemed as if my forehead was huge Lemme see if I can get it.

Here ’tis: emilie

So – do I add bangs (probably not) or change my part? Opinions? This is, after all, Reinventing Fabulous, and I’m happy to become even more fabulous.

12 Sep

Photo on 9-12-16 at 8.39 AM It’s cold this morning! I’m sitting in my chair wearing a fabulous coat Crusie made for me (it was the only warm thing around). I look glorious in it. Jenny – if you have a better picture of it add it to the post. I really is gorgeous.
Went to a fabulous staged reading of The Belle of Amherst on Saturday night with our terrific artist in residence, Marla Shaffel (she’s a Tony-award nominee). Wept through the second half, but mostly I try not to weep. I said something terrible to someone afterwards – not cruel, of course, but thinking I was being wry. But it was absolutely the wrong thing to say, and the person was hurt, damn it. I spent yesterday feeling awful, explaining and apologizing, and the person was incredibly gracious (in fact I sent her an apology and an explanation before I got her email asking why I’d said what I said). The thing is, I love being outspoken. And I love being wry, and funny, and shocking people with my honesty.
But.
I hate like hell to hurt people, and that can happen really easily if I just let my mouth flap without thinking through the consequences. I think of the immediate amusement, not that it could backfire. I don’t want to tone down, because I’m me, but I don’t want to hurt people. I’ve got to find some kind of balance. I still want to say irreverent things if they pop into my mind, and some people will be offended by just about anything. I guess if I had to choose between being reserved and never offending anyone (which is impossible – people can be offended by my dissing Donald Trump!) and being outspoken and occasionally hurting, then I guess I gotta go with occasional hurting. But I can spare one extra moment to think about it.
Ah, 68 years and I’m never gonna learn.
We’ve booked our flight to Reno (the 21st) and now have to find a place to stay. Mini-me and I have to figure out a place to stay – Mini-me offered to have us, of course, but I think we need a place were we can be alone with Tim to work things out this time. I’m getting edgier and weepier as the time comes, but my therapist and I are working out a list of things to do to get him the supports he needs. Coming home, unless he’s really paralyzed, is impossible because everyone he knows is on heroin. All his friends from our town have moved away, and the surrounding towns (most of them) have a lot of social problems, including addiction.
We’ll figure it out. One day at a time. Interesting thing: I’ve noticed when I’m not depressed (like now) I get more more anxious. I’ve had to take half a tranquilizer a couple of times in the last three week (obviously I don’t get THAT anxious) and I expect I’ll need them more often. When I’m in a depression I’m too low to get anxious – I’m just hopeless, and you can’t fix that.
I’m going in to pick up my new glasses today – I’ve had these since 2012, so I’ll need feedback on how they look. Tune in tomorrow.
This week I finish revisions on one book and start on another, work on the house. I’m actually getting things done! And still losing weight.
What’s on your agenda?

Jenny’s Edit to Add Krissie’s Diva Coat:

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Happy: A Discussion

11 Sep

This Oatmeal post has interesting things to say about the concept of “happy.”

I don’t agree with it because he defines “happy” as a permanent state, a goal to be reached and then maintained, while I think “happy” is in the moment. I think the writer of the essay (not the artist) set up a straw horse, possibly to show how cool he is. But I think it’s still a good essay. And I love the graphics.

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How were you momentarily happy this week?