Archive by Author

Alt om Du (Krissie – Anna Kristina)

20 Feb

Photo on 2-20-17 at 9.29 AM That’s me from the shower (Det er mig fra brusenbad). Practicing my Danish here. We’re getting warm weather and that shit load (don’t know the word for shit yet, or snow for that matter) of snow we got is rapidly melting. We’ll probably end up with only a foot or so on the ground.
Richie was evil, and he never is. For the first time in 44 years he didn’t get me flowers on Valentine’s Day. Now, we don’t tend to go crazy on V-day. Sometimes we’ll go out for dinner but our anniversary is two weeks later, so we usually combine, and we seldom get presents for each other. I might cook something extra nice. Anyway, with our limited resources and the way they jack the flower (blomst) prices up, I was gonna tell him not to bother with flowers. I’m usually really clear about expectations, reminding him of stuff if I think he’ll forget (he never does). Before I could say something he told me he was going out (which is rare – when Richie goes out I go with him) so I naturally thought, aw, he’s going to get me flowers. Should have told him not to at that point and cleared things up. So off I went to my appointment, got back, and waited for him. And he came in without flowers. Didn’t even mention them to say “I’m sorry I didn’t get you flowers this year.” And even though it wasn’t a conscious fuss on my part, I was moody that night.
Went out and got myself half-price flowers the next day, and he hasn’t even noticed. Probably too caught up with dealing with our finances, and of course I forgive him. I didn’t want to say anything, because he’ll feel so bad.
But now I’m thinking that maybe I need to, just to clear the air. In a non-accusatory fashion.
Whaddya all think? I don’t often go to anyone for marital advice – I have a marriage that’s a gift from god, but nothing’s perfect. Should I say something or get over it?
I started a new book, even though I’m halfway through a historical that I love. Something was getting in the way of my working every day, so I dragged out an old yet totally current (for me) idea and started writing. Came up with a 91 song play list, dashed off stuff effortlessly (right now the historical is like pulling teeth) and yet I feel guilty because everyone wants the historical and I’ve been promising it for years. Hmmm – what was it about “George R. R. Martin is not your bitch”? Gotta think about that for a bit. I like to make people happy. I’m not precisely a people-pleaser – at least I don’t think I am – but if I can do something that makes people happy it gives me pleasure – part of why I was such a good caregiver from my mother when she’d seldom been maternal. But something’s getting in the way of Brandon and Emma.
So I’m keeping on with Oops (terrible but fitting working title). Spent the weekend sewing (I’ll try to show pictures tomorrow) and the week is gonna be spent writing and sewing and cleaning (slowly, bit by bit). Playing with our kitties. Trying to figure life out.
What’s on your agenda? Should I talk to Richie, or should I …

All About You (Krissie)

13 Feb

Photo on 2-13-17 at 9.04 AM I opened up Photo Booth to take a photo this morning and I looked awful — the angle at which I was sitting (in the recliner) made my chin droop down to my chest, my skin was all wrinkly from sleep (just woke up), my hair needs a wash, my eyes looked tired. That expression was a reaction to my momentary lack of gloriousness. I find myself amusing, at least, I find my rare vanity amusing.
How are you all, my darlings? First, an infomercial.
I have a new book out tomorrow – WILDFIRE. Hot romantic suspense, a Tom Hiddleston hero if he’s your cup of tea (if he’s not, think Daniel Craig or whoever floats your boat). Given the state of publishing, it might be my last book put out by a publishing house, so I want it to go out with a bang! If you like romantic suspense and have money to spare, treat yourself. (OHMYGOD, I hate to shill my own books. But this one is really a treat).
Aw, fuck it. Ignore me.
We’re coming to the tail end of a massive snowstorm. Every school in the state is closed, and we know how to deal with snow. I expect we got about 18 inches – we’ll find out tonight – and everything is white and fluffy. The clouds are gray, though, so it’s still kinda gloomy. I’m going to write like crazy today – I love what I’m working on, but I’m easily distracted. Gotta sharpen my focus.
I also need to get out more. I haven’t been going anywhere but my therapist’s, and that’s not good for me. Then again, it’s been a snowy winter and there’s no discretionary money, plus I have more things at home to do than I can get to. Ah, whine whine whine. I seem to be very impatient with myself this morning.
Here’s your Danish word for the day – selvfolgelig (there’s supposed to be a slash through the Ø but this keyboard is being recalcitrant). It’s pronounced self-oh-loo-lee and it means of course. I really love Danish (jeg elsker dansk). I’m kind of amazed at all the stuff I’ve memorized – I think I have a natural ability when it comes to languages. I know I’ve got a definite interest when it comes to words (duh).
So I decided this week I would take care of my health, and I’ve got a mammogram, a physical therapy, and a dental appointment lined up. We also honed in on getting a new mortgage which should help get us out of debt, so that would be nice. And I’m damned well going to sew.
And oh lord I have to do PR stuff for the book. Plus, it’s Valentine’s Day. Richie offered to buy me chocolates (he knows I hate chocolate). I countered with he could take me to La La Land. He was NOT happy. Heh heh heh.

So what’s on your agenda? Got any Valentine day plans? (Can’t call it V-day, that’s Victory Day, can’t call it VD, that’s venereal disease, so I gotta spell it out.)
What’s on your agenda?

All About You (Krissie)

6 Feb

Photo on 2-6-17 at 9.44 AM That’s my general state of mind when it comes to the world today. Aiyee!

I know, I was gonna talk about hair and stuff and then I got distracted. Tomorrow.

Wrote four days this week, which is an improvement, but didn’t get a lot done. Still working with my bedtime screen addiction – I start with my iPad, sometimes as early as 7:30, and can keep going till 1:30. I guess because I’m snug in bed, cats are all around me, Richie’s beside me, and there’s nothing I’m supposed to do (but sleep). But it means I get up late and feel logy and …
Well, it’s a hard time of year. Vermont is very dark in the winter, we’re currently strapped so there’s no getting out, and everything feels stagnant. I feel like I need a kick in the butt or something. But I shall persevere.

I was hoping hoping that the Patriots would lose, because of that cheating, ball-deflating, cheetoh-loving quarterback, but I guess the truth is he’s really good at what he does, and fuck politics (if you’ll pardon the expression). I made wings for the first time (we actually mainly watched the Puppy Bowl and the Kitten Bowl and even a little bit of the Fish Bowl, but that one was pretty boring). Messy things, aren’t they? (the wings, though the puppies and kittens can be too). I dread the clean-up. (You mean I haven’t cleaned up yesterday’s dishes? Why no, she says innocently).

feifferOkay, kick in the butt week. Picture me dancing … omygod, I suddenly realized what my word for 2017 should be. It’s dancing! Leaping and twirling in joy, sliding and jumping and doing the tarantella to fight off demons. So today I shall dance. (The sad thing being I sure as hell can’t dance – I can barely walk – but my soul can dance, so I’m dancing).

So. Writing. Playing with my dolls, goddammit (the entire weekend spent without any sewing or tinkering).


What’s on your agenda?

All About you (Krissie)

30 Jan

Photo on 1-30-17 at 9.32 AM Qu’elle matin! Except I gotta stop doing that! I did tell you all I’m learning Danish, didn’t I? Jeg kan tale lidt Dansk. (I can speak a little Danish). I’m actually zipping right along, except certain words I speak with a French accent (like interessant, which has quite a different pronunciation in both languages (means interesting). I can get the vowels and the accents right in the Danish version, but I can’t keep the R from sounding French.

So, okay. Helluva weekend, right? I don’t know if we can help from getting political. My cousin and family and congregation staged a protest at Detroit airport (lots of other people as well). In airports around the world. So there’s always a silver lining.

I wrote 4 days last week, up from three, and got good stuff done. I sorted through the leftover boxes in the sewing room and put them away, plus finally moved the other bookcase in. Took the zipper out of a vintage Hawaiian dress, (which I wore to sing backup to “Respect” accompanied by an accordion on the town green on Bicentennial Weekend. It’s a strapless red batik sundress and I wore elbow length white gloves and had to keep yanking the top up during the performance.) Got a pair of girls’ jeans for my AG trans boy, and sewed flannel patches over the pink flowers.

Went to a NAMI meeting but missed my shrink (ice storm). Oh, and best of all, I was feeling a little pudgier. Didn’t want to get on the scale but knew I had to if I was getting off track. I got on, expecting my weight to be up a couple of pounds and instead it was down two pounds! I’m now at 222.3, which means I’ve lost 27.5 pounds. Really really slowly, but really really steadily and painlessly, so det er godt. (That’s good). Faster would be nice, but since this requires only minimal effort (been off the bad stuff so long it doesn’t appeal to me, like cake and cookies etc) maybe I shouldn’t mess with success. In fact, this really isn’t a diet, it’s a lifestyle change, the way it’s supposed to be..

This week I’m going to the big city today (with Richie) – 140 miles roundtrip (and the state starts taking tax off Amazon on Wednesday, god dammit). I’m torn about this state – the taxes are so high but they pay for social services which are fabulous (except for mental health care). Sending off lots of packages (an Amazon return, a doll to the AG doll hospital ), getting Tim’s iPhones looked at, taking stuff to Good Will, getting some nitrate-free turkey kielbasa. You know, the usual.

I’ve got my therapist, I’ve got tons of writing to do, and I’ve got writing business to do (major). I gotta get organized. I got a nasty shock when I received my w-2s or whatever they’re called for writers’ income. Usually I get depressed because I can’t figure out where the money went and how we’ll manage to pay the extra taxes on it. This year I’m depressed because now I know why there isn’t any money. At least we can pay the government less.

So the usual – writing, organizing, sewing. And I gotta add business to the “usual.”

The kitties are thriving – both sleep on our bed at night, between us (though I sleep so soundly I often wake up in the morning and find Lilu as curled up on my stomach).

So what’s on your agenda? Anyone working on weight stuff? How’s that coming? Hey, tomorrow let’s talk about beautifying our rusty old hulks (in my case, that is).


All About Sisterhood (Krissie)

23 Jan

Photo on 1-23-17 at 8.35 AM Hard to believe I’d be feeling good three days after … god, I don’t even want to say it. By now you must know Jenny’s and my politics, and nowadays it has a more immediate impact on our lives (I avoid using impact as a verb). So while this isn’t going to become a political platform, opinions are going to come up, and I’m afraid opinions on our current president are strong. So if you’re of a differing opinion just skip my opinions on the flaming orange cheet-0 president.
march1 Saturday was so good it made up for a lot of bad. I didn’t march, I rolled, which given the slush and the crowd was damned tricky. I was pushed by an award-winning fiber artist, Judy Dales. I’ll put one of her quilts at the bottom of this but the photo doesn’t do it justice. Her work is amazing.
Anyway, we all rode in a rented school bus driven by Sherral, Bobbi arranged it, I sat with BJ, Big Tim went and grabbed me a hat, Betsy looked out for me, Erika sat behind us. I gotta remember I do have friends here, even if I don’t often see them. I wish I could see them more, but their lives center around what’s called The Walking Women, we they all walk three times a week and then get together for muffins at each others’ houses. They’re a powerful force, and obviously I can’t participate.
Last time I did an actual, organized march through a downtown was all the way back after MLK was murdered. We walked through the center of downtown Newark, which was a pretty funky place. Since then I’ve been on demonstrations (tear gas in Washington), sit-ins (arrest in NYC for blocking a draft board – I even went to the Tombs!), vigils (the Iraq war) and I’m not that active politically (though I’ve been sending money this year). the times they are a-changing, though, and I gotta get vigilant. Problem is, I can’t very well write my congressmen. I mean, what would I accomplish by writing Bernie or Pat Leahy to tell them what I think of the president’s actions? They’re already on point.
Anyway, a glorious day, a reminder that we’re all bonded (on a personal level as well as a political level). It was glorious.
So, this week.
I actually wrote three days last week, and I’m half done on Brandon and Emma. I did some sewing, and I’m off to Jo-ann’s to buy doll clothes patterns for $1 a piece (for my transgender American Girl Boy doll (they have a Dr. Who pattern!). Gotta write, gotta clean, gotta sew. Gotta call an SSI lawyer for Tim, gotta check on Daniel, got a life to live.
The weight has plateaued 25 pounds lower than my last stable weight, and it’s effortless (sugar doesn’t call to me, nor do fried things) so I’ll keep on with that. I’m rolling up my sleeves and digging in.
So what’s on your agenda? Anyone else march? How are people doing with their vision for the new year?
judymarch 2

Furry Friends Again (Krissie)

17 Jan

So here’s the roundup of the rest of our darlings.  I’m astonished at the difference the cats have made in our lives.  I think it’s because we always had animals – we never realized what it was like not to have one.  But two years ago Cello died (a rescue cat from my ex BIL), Pooska died (a darling mini-Maine coon cat) of extreme old age (19 – she’d just showed up in her garage one day when she was a baby).  We were left with Phantom, who was such a darling he filled our lives.  And then, as Tim’s illness exploded (indeed, on the very day something seemed to snap with him) Phantom was hit by a car.  It’s even possible he accidentally hit him – we’ll never know.  And life was so hideously awful that we were just holding on for dear life, like survivors in a Tsunami as the flood waters swirling around us and the wind shook the trees we were clinging to.

We went through two years like that, with the occasional respite of cuddling Crusie’s dogs, who are exceptionally snuggly.  And then things hit rock bottom, Richie was so depressed it was almost clinical, I was shell-shocked.  And the kitties arrived.  I said to Richie that suddenly things were better – that I was no longer pushing him to see a therapist.  He started to deny feeling better (because we’re still a little terrified about what might happen) when I said “it just sort of grounds us, having the animals.”  And that’s what it does.  Life is just not so bleak.  It’s a reminder that certain things are eternal when so much else is random.

But you guys with pets know that.  In a way it was a good thing not to have the pets for a while – I took them for granted as a part of life.  I’d never realized just how necessary they were. IMG_0542 copy IMG_0546 These are Jennifer’s kitties – they bought some chairs to assemble and of course the cats claimed them. I’m assuming the boxes were too flat for them to crawl into.



And we have image1 – Kelly’s babies. Sophie and Zep. Zep has gone to the Rainbow Bridge, but he still feels part of her life.



And a guest visit from Neko, Barb Samuel’s 20 lb. horse-kitty. She was just so damned cute I had to add her. 10846104_763606667063258_1826272992756446438_n

All About You (Krissie)

16 Jan

Photo on 1-16-17 at 9.56 AM #2 Ah, me! (Which, incidentally, is what Juliet says at the beginning of the balcony scene). I’m full of quotes today. I looked at my image on Photo Booth and I looked soooooooooo old! But then the line from “Gigi” popped into my mind – “Am I getting old?” “Oh, no, not you!”
And now that song will be in my head all day.
I’m working on hauling out my office, but it’s a huge job. I need to figure out how to break it down-it gets too overwhelming. I keep grabbing boxes full of stuff and finding twenty differents places for things to go. I probably need to find ways to break it down, and yet, storing, tossing and giving away is a no brainer, but a lot of the stuff simply needs to go somewhere. Probably because my office is downstairs, I toss everything in there if I have to do a sudden cleaning (it’s always wrapping and present center during Christmas). I need to figure out how many receptacles I need and where to find ’em. I have one for giveaways, one for “to-file”, one for memorabilia (my mother’s writing, etc), trash, of course, one for office supplies …
Okay, bird by bird. I managed to write three days last week – I’m hoping for five this week but four will do. Things are always pulling at me. I’ve decided I can’t start swimming again – it’s too expensive and takes too long (25 miles away). (However, I’m seeing more surgeon tomorrow since it’s been a year since my shoulder replacement and it might be a good idea for the shoulder, in which case I’ll figure it out). So it’s gonna be writing in the morning, working on the house in the afternoon and sewing when I get the chance.

My pal Mort (Maggie Shayne) has a system where she breaks her days into segments – I think they’re two-hour ones. She puts them in spiritual terms, but I’m just trying to be as simple as possible. If I could implement that it would be perfect – one segment for writing every day (always with the option for keeping going), one segment for the house, one segment for fun. I’ve got to put some thought into it – how much downtime in between, etc. I’ll work on this and let you know how it goes.

Tomorrow the rest of the pets! I found a cat video on Amazon (as in, video for cats, with squirrels and birds) and our babies when crazy. Thunderpaws kept looking behind the flat screen, trying to find the squirrel, Lulubelle sat on the rug, transfixed. It was a hoot!

What’s on your agenda? (And no, I’m not getting old, right? Older, sure. I like that. I just wish it could go both ways).