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All About You (Krissie)

27 Mar

That’s me contemplating our political situation.

I overslept, but it felt good. Now I’m going to write a cracking good scene and then hopefully go swimming. Life is good.
I did get back to the pool last week, and it was glorious. I’d been feeling so constrained in my own body, and when I got in the water I could move again. I’m not sure why I’m having such pain issues everywhere – well, it’s probably fibromyalgia but I like to ignore that. I have a moderate case, fortunately without the brain fog, etc., but I’ve deal with pain since my ’40s. Nowadays the things that hurt have a reason for hurting (knees, shoulder)but sometimes things aren’t so bad. Not now.

But I digress. Yesterday was Richie’s birthday and I was finally able to say “Til lykke med fødselsdagen.” Sounds like “til looga mel foosulsdayen.” Made me very happy. We went out for gourmet pizza because an ice storm was coming and that was the closest place (I live in the country – the next closest was forty miles away). I told him that for his birthday I would generously deign to have sex with him and perform certain intimate favors. He laughed. Why do women in their sixties (and presumably seventies as well) still have powerful libidos while men get kinda tired? More proof that God’s a man. (grumble grumble).

I also got my embroidery attachment out to see if it still worked and it did. I had an epic fail at stenciling on the doll bed Richie made and I painted – guess I should a) read how to do it and b) practice on a piece of wood. Had to scrub it off and then repaint that section, but I’ll practice and see what I come up with. this is for the American Girl Kristen doll, which I’ll be giving my part Scandinavian granddaughter when she’s old enough. Unless she’s not into dolls at that point, in which case she’s mine, all mine (insane cackle). Gotta take some pictures – I need to remember to do a “I made it” Tuesday or whenever. And see if others can upload photos straight instead of having to go through me.

So – the week. Writing, swimming, PT, sewing, and then on the weekend we drive down to Boston to see the final performance of GAAR, the theater group that’s been so important to me. It’s a harrowing play about a woman about to be stoned to death in a middle-eastern country. We’ll stay with my wonderful cousin Emmie, then the next day go on to the Cape for the memorial service for his step-father. We’ve got someone to come in and play with the cats, so we’re good, though I know Richie will pine.

And shit. My left hand is tingling. Damn damn damn. I want to write today but I’m having problems with my fucking hands, pardon my Anglo-saxon. I’m about to put Emma and Brandon in bed for the first time. Pray for me.

What’s on your agenda?

All About You (Krissie)

20 Mar

So, the photo on the right is today, 2017. The photos on the left are, on top, me from 2012, when I’d lost a lot of weight, and 2013, when I gained it all back. If I get to the other computer I’ll see if I can find photos from the same day in ’14, ’15 and ’16. I never realized when I started putting up photos that I’d end up with such an interesting resource.

So, anyway, how did you guys survive the blizzard, those of you who had it? We got thirty inches or more, coming down at 4 inches per hour at times, with a strong wind. Every school in the state was closed, and we know how to deal with snow in Vermont. Now we’re opening windows (it’s only 50 or so but it’s nice to get fresh air.)

Speaking of being fabulous, I’ve decided I have to go back swimming again. I feel like I’m living in a coffin-shaped box – that’s about how much I move and can move. It’s only in the water that I can really stretch out. It takes time and money, but neither price is crushing (I can swim for $100 for 6 months and the pool is available from 6 am to 8 pm (with two hours off in the afternoon for students). The drive takes about half an hour, but if I lived in NYC or near traffic it would take that long or longer – it’s 24 miles away). All the time changing and showering is time I don’t waste at home doing the same thing (I go under the shower before I get in the pool). I can’t walk, my replaced shoulder is incredibly stiff and painful, and I my body’s become a prison. Plus, I won’t get all the exercise I usually get in the summer when I’m acting. Gotta do something.

The weight is staying off (though not dropping lower – it would be lovely to drop below 220 and stay there.) My big goal is to get below 200 and stay there for a while. I guess I need to put a little more effort into it, but right now it’s absolutely painless – I don’t lust for sugar and fried food and huge amounts. But I could probably cut healthy carbs back a little.

It’s nice when it’s no longer vanity motivating me. My relationship with vanity has always been contentious (I think that’s true for most people). My sister was beautiful, and she always made it clear that she was the pretty one. That backfired because she started feeling that being pretty was her only value, and she basically ate herself to death (it said her death was caused by COPD complicated by obesity). And in fact I’ve been going through old photos and looking at myself dispassionately and realizing I’ve always felt way too negative about myself. I remember about 50 years ago Buffalo Springfield had a song about “pretty girl, why not love me?” and I wept because I wasn’t a pretty girl. And you know, I was. Almost all 18 year old girls are.

Feeling good feels a lot better than looking good, and that’s my goal. Tomorrow I will lumber onto the scale – nope, that’s too negative. I will trip lightly onto the scale, face the music, and move on.

I can’t fix everything (there’s a stunner!) and I can’t fix much, but there are things I can do.

So tell me, what’s up for you guys? Anyone serious about their weight and their mobility right now? Or is work a major consideration? Family? I’ve got all three things pulling at me, and the body tends to be the first thing to go by the wayside but I’ve got to spend time on me if I want to do all those other things. Seems I’ve got energy right now.

So … wassup?

All About You (Krissie)

6 Mar

Godmorgen. Jeg her træt.
Which means I’m tired. Cats woke us up before seven, so I got up and watched the news while Richie was able to get back to sleep. I don’t get to watch the news when Richie’s awake – he can’t stand it. I can only take it in short spurts. There was the usual shitstorm, though apparently this time it’s even worse. I try not to panic about the state of the world. I try not to lose hope.

Ah, but I spent Saturday with my grandchildren, a sure cure for hopelessness. Alex is fabulous – his curly hair is down to his shoulders (he’s growing it to donate to Locks of Love or some cancer society that provides wigs for cancer patients).
And Ali is the fiercest, cutest child in the world. I’ll put up photos later.

So, this week I have to go to Town Meeting and kick butt, have to go to the big city to get my meds. I made a hoop skirt and worked on Kirsten’s flannel underwear for the dolls, but now I want to sew something bigger. Gonna work on that this week.
Plus Richie and I made a place for me to work upstairs, and that’s what I’m going to do. Just the usual. I may go down and see Crusie and Lani, but I may have gotten my dates mixed up. We’ll figure it out eventually.

So how’s by you? How the upcoming week – anything exciting? Are there signs of spring? (It was 3 degrees with a wind on Saturday).
Wassup?

All About You (Krissie)

27 Feb

Hello, my darlings! It’s a gorgeous day out there – a little cold but the sun is bright, the sky is a clear blue and there’s a fresh clean layer of snow. What’s not to like?
We spent the weekend working on the house, having a good time with each other.
So, this week. Tomorrow Richie and I go out on our Valentine’s Day/Anniversary/Christmas present – we’re going to the big city to see Australian guitarist Tommy Emmanuel. We’ll go for an early bird dinner at one of the best restaurants in Burlington, we’ll come home to our kitties, Tim is stable, Daniel’s probably a bit iffy but he’s dealing with it on him own, which is a good thing (he’s 32 and a little past being rescued). We’re okay. (Country’s fucked but we’re okay. And we’re working on the country – one good thing that’s come out of this mess: we now appreciate the good stuff. And how about that sentence structure – a dash and a colon!)
Gonna get my ass to a demonstration to support immigration (up at the Canadian border). Your political mileage may vary, but know I want the best for people).
We spent the weekend cleaning up a part of the bedroom so I can write up there again (I have various places in the house I write, and sometimes I just need to move to a new place to get a fresh slant on a book). Oh, I’m just feeling good today (Dansk = glad, which is pronounced glell – go figure. Jeg er glad.) We have shrimp for dinner, I’m going to sew, the bedroom is getting cleaner, I’m taking my ancient iPod in to be fixed (found a place), it’s … it’s just a nice day. Not spectacular, just kind of nice. Nice is underrated.
Week – writing, sewing, cleaning, just like every other week. But I need to add in shoulder exercise, some cooking because i like to cook and Richie shouldn’t have to do all the cooking). Lots of things to do.
What’s on your agenda?

Alt om Du (Krissie – Anna Kristina)

20 Feb

Photo on 2-20-17 at 9.29 AM That’s me from the shower (Det er mig fra brusenbad). Practicing my Danish here. We’re getting warm weather and that shit load (don’t know the word for shit yet, or snow for that matter) of snow we got is rapidly melting. We’ll probably end up with only a foot or so on the ground.
Richie was evil, and he never is. For the first time in 44 years he didn’t get me flowers on Valentine’s Day. Now, we don’t tend to go crazy on V-day. Sometimes we’ll go out for dinner but our anniversary is two weeks later, so we usually combine, and we seldom get presents for each other. I might cook something extra nice. Anyway, with our limited resources and the way they jack the flower (blomst) prices up, I was gonna tell him not to bother with flowers. I’m usually really clear about expectations, reminding him of stuff if I think he’ll forget (he never does). Before I could say something he told me he was going out (which is rare – when Richie goes out I go with him) so I naturally thought, aw, he’s going to get me flowers. Should have told him not to at that point and cleared things up. So off I went to my appointment, got back, and waited for him. And he came in without flowers. Didn’t even mention them to say “I’m sorry I didn’t get you flowers this year.” And even though it wasn’t a conscious fuss on my part, I was moody that night.
Went out and got myself half-price flowers the next day, and he hasn’t even noticed. Probably too caught up with dealing with our finances, and of course I forgive him. I didn’t want to say anything, because he’ll feel so bad.
But now I’m thinking that maybe I need to, just to clear the air. In a non-accusatory fashion.
Whaddya all think? I don’t often go to anyone for marital advice – I have a marriage that’s a gift from god, but nothing’s perfect. Should I say something or get over it?
I started a new book, even though I’m halfway through a historical that I love. Something was getting in the way of my working every day, so I dragged out an old yet totally current (for me) idea and started writing. Came up with a 91 song play list, dashed off stuff effortlessly (right now the historical is like pulling teeth) and yet I feel guilty because everyone wants the historical and I’ve been promising it for years. Hmmm – what was it about “George R. R. Martin is not your bitch”? Gotta think about that for a bit. I like to make people happy. I’m not precisely a people-pleaser – at least I don’t think I am – but if I can do something that makes people happy it gives me pleasure – part of why I was such a good caregiver from my mother when she’d seldom been maternal. But something’s getting in the way of Brandon and Emma.
So I’m keeping on with Oops (terrible but fitting working title). Spent the weekend sewing (I’ll try to show pictures tomorrow) and the week is gonna be spent writing and sewing and cleaning (slowly, bit by bit). Playing with our kitties. Trying to figure life out.
What’s on your agenda? Should I talk to Richie, or should I …

All About You (Krissie)

13 Feb

Photo on 2-13-17 at 9.04 AM I opened up Photo Booth to take a photo this morning and I looked awful — the angle at which I was sitting (in the recliner) made my chin droop down to my chest, my skin was all wrinkly from sleep (just woke up), my hair needs a wash, my eyes looked tired. That expression was a reaction to my momentary lack of gloriousness. I find myself amusing, at least, I find my rare vanity amusing.
How are you all, my darlings? First, an infomercial.
I have a new book out tomorrow – WILDFIRE. Hot romantic suspense, a Tom Hiddleston hero if he’s your cup of tea (if he’s not, think Daniel Craig or whoever floats your boat). Given the state of publishing, it might be my last book put out by a publishing house, so I want it to go out with a bang! If you like romantic suspense and have money to spare, treat yourself. (OHMYGOD, I hate to shill my own books. But this one is really a treat).
Aw, fuck it. Ignore me.
We’re coming to the tail end of a massive snowstorm. Every school in the state is closed, and we know how to deal with snow. I expect we got about 18 inches – we’ll find out tonight – and everything is white and fluffy. The clouds are gray, though, so it’s still kinda gloomy. I’m going to write like crazy today – I love what I’m working on, but I’m easily distracted. Gotta sharpen my focus.
I also need to get out more. I haven’t been going anywhere but my therapist’s, and that’s not good for me. Then again, it’s been a snowy winter and there’s no discretionary money, plus I have more things at home to do than I can get to. Ah, whine whine whine. I seem to be very impatient with myself this morning.
Here’s your Danish word for the day – selvfolgelig (there’s supposed to be a slash through the Ø but this keyboard is being recalcitrant). It’s pronounced self-oh-loo-lee and it means of course. I really love Danish (jeg elsker dansk). I’m kind of amazed at all the stuff I’ve memorized – I think I have a natural ability when it comes to languages. I know I’ve got a definite interest when it comes to words (duh).
So I decided this week I would take care of my health, and I’ve got a mammogram, a physical therapy, and a dental appointment lined up. We also honed in on getting a new mortgage which should help get us out of debt, so that would be nice. And I’m damned well going to sew.
And oh lord I have to do PR stuff for the book. Plus, it’s Valentine’s Day. Richie offered to buy me chocolates (he knows I hate chocolate). I countered with he could take me to La La Land. He was NOT happy. Heh heh heh.

So what’s on your agenda? Got any Valentine day plans? (Can’t call it V-day, that’s Victory Day, can’t call it VD, that’s venereal disease, so I gotta spell it out.)
What’s on your agenda?

All About You (Krissie)

6 Feb

Photo on 2-6-17 at 9.44 AM That’s my general state of mind when it comes to the world today. Aiyee!

I know, I was gonna talk about hair and stuff and then I got distracted. Tomorrow.

Wrote four days this week, which is an improvement, but didn’t get a lot done. Still working with my bedtime screen addiction – I start with my iPad, sometimes as early as 7:30, and can keep going till 1:30. I guess because I’m snug in bed, cats are all around me, Richie’s beside me, and there’s nothing I’m supposed to do (but sleep). But it means I get up late and feel logy and …
Well, it’s a hard time of year. Vermont is very dark in the winter, we’re currently strapped so there’s no getting out, and everything feels stagnant. I feel like I need a kick in the butt or something. But I shall persevere.

I was hoping hoping that the Patriots would lose, because of that cheating, ball-deflating, cheetoh-loving quarterback, but I guess the truth is he’s really good at what he does, and fuck politics (if you’ll pardon the expression). I made wings for the first time (we actually mainly watched the Puppy Bowl and the Kitten Bowl and even a little bit of the Fish Bowl, but that one was pretty boring). Messy things, aren’t they? (the wings, though the puppies and kittens can be too). I dread the clean-up. (You mean I haven’t cleaned up yesterday’s dishes? Why no, she says innocently).

feifferOkay, kick in the butt week. Picture me dancing … omygod, I suddenly realized what my word for 2017 should be. It’s dancing! Leaping and twirling in joy, sliding and jumping and doing the tarantella to fight off demons. So today I shall dance. (The sad thing being I sure as hell can’t dance – I can barely walk – but my soul can dance, so I’m dancing).

So. Writing. Playing with my dolls, goddammit (the entire weekend spent without any sewing or tinkering).

Dancing!

What’s on your agenda?